I went over to “our” house. He like wanted nothing to do with me. We then talked. Well he kinda yelled while I talked. He was telling me everything he hates about me. I then realized my depression came back.. It’s been back for a while. I can never get away from it. It always comes back. Anyways, Logan decided to give me a week to change back to the person I once was. The person whom I wanted to be.
I mean. Isn’t he supposed to help me through it. He shouldn’t give me a deadline, right? I don’t know. Anyways this whole experience jump started me into the right direction that I need to be on..
I love him but I wish he showed me he loves me too. If he even does anymore..
I packed up my shit and went back to my mother’s house. I can’t stop crying. The only time I’m happy is when I am playing with Dex.. but he is sleeping right now and I am bawling as I am typing this. I miss him so much.. I know he doesn’t miss me tho, that is what’s hard. He is the father of my child and he told me to leave. So I left. He didn’t even hesitate for me to say.. He has not talked to me since. I’m broken. He broke me.
He said he lost feelings for me…. what!?
I fucking hate cleaning. wahh! :/
My boyfriend got on my tumblr and read everything… awkward. :o
Either I’m boring.. or my followers suck.
So, last night. I have not cried so hard in a long time!
We were just fighting so bad, probably one of the worsts. I don’t even remember about what. I grabbed my purse and told him I was leaving. I then slammed the door. and I looked at my car. I just sat on the porch steps and lit up a cigarette. I couldn’t leave. Leaving means giving up and I could not give up on my family. Plus, I felt like I was leaving my son, I could not do that.
BUT then at bed time, we were fine. Completely fine. Like nothing ever happened. We were going to have sex, but our son started crying. I fed him and then Logan kissed me good night and we went to bed.
Today he text me “Have a good day. I love you”
Today my home nurse came and I told her about us fighting. She said that was normal when two people move in with each other with a baby. Especially how young we are. She said her and her husband were like that too.. She said as long as we stay together and don’t give up.. it will be better. We just have to get used to living together. That made me feel better.
I am in love with Logan and I don’t want my children to have different dads so I want us to work.
gummibar asked: Hey! My name's Molly and I run the Gummibar tumblr. I have a favor to ask - is there any way you would be able to reblog/let people know that Gummibar is going to be at Comic Con in NYC this year? I understand if not, but it's just that we've never been before, and especially because there is a children's day (Sunday Oct 14) we would love for as many people to know about it as possible. There will be meet & greets, performances, & giveaways :) Thank you SO much, have a great day!
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Anonymous asked: Sam, your priority at this point should be Dex. Unfortunately in the circumstances, it may not be possible for you to do what is best for you, and leave because of other factors. Don't lose hope in that though. If Logan doesn't love you anymore, he doesn't, you can't change it. But you both love your son, and giving him a loving environment is all that matters. It must be hard having to be a mother, only being 17, but be strong :)
I’m 18 now. hahaa, thats irrelevant , but i thought i would point that out. Actually, I decided to just let it go and not freak out about everything I don’t like about him. It’s hard because I expect a lot more than I get.. but nothing can’t be perfect, right?
minimamma1898 answered: i actually had to leave my baby daddy cuz he started to hurt my son cuz of his baby blues so just make sure to be careful and love that baby
… He loves our son, he would never hurt him. It’s not the baby blues. He loves taking care of him and being with him. He just doesn’t love being with me
Anonymous asked: I'm a real sucker for trying to make people happy even if they treat me like shit. When me and my boyfriend were going through a rough patch I did anything I could for his attention - I brought him cute little gifts and just planned to do things to show him that I would do anything for him. Organise to go out for a movieor go somewhere cheap and cheerful for dinner. Write him a cute little love letter about why you love him and how he is making you feel. He'll soon realise what he will loose:)
I used to do all that until we had a baby. I might just have to start doing that again. Thank you. (:
Your boyfriend is a lucky dude <3